littlesilvertip

Got a late start, and headed down to somewhere with a weak gauntlet to try move things through the gauntlet… differently. Slowly and surely, I wedged myself into the mix, and began pulling. It pulled back. I pulled harder. It pushed me back. I tried to wedge myself in there, but I got caught in some of the webs. No good. Only one arm was trapped, so I managed to get it out.

I tried again. Slowly, and carefully, I pressed the two worlds together, before punching a hole. Again, I put myself into the mix, and began pulling the hole wider, and wider. As soon as I did, it started shrinking in other places where I moved my paws from. I need four paws to do this! The Fianna metis might excel at this gift. But, I was struck by an idea: I repeated the process, but when I went to stretch the hole bigger in one place, I wedged a bit of my spirit in the way where I’d moved my paws from. It started to tire me out quickly, but before I let it collapse again, took my paws off it, and it stayed open. I had done it successfully: I had made a bridge between the worlds the spirits could go through. I’m too tired to try and put this all together yet, but from here, it should be straightforward enough. I just need to do both things at the same time - calling the elementals to me, while making a hole for them to fit through. That’s a lot to do at once.

( Running into Viv, talking about Jamethon )

As I was heading back, I smelled something - dead rabbits and Nova. She was heading through the snow over towards my cousin; I ran on over as the two were introducing themselves. Copperhead showed up too, and started unnerving the Kin, so I made her come over and show what she was. Everyone was about as disgusted as I was at seeing her, but now they won’t mistake her for a horned serpent animal-thing, at least. Just… a disgusting Metis. Which is what she is. Copperhead thinks Nova should have kids… if only she knew…

After telling Copperhead to go find Realm Walker, and Nova went inside, I went to get my cousin, as her why she wasn’t talking to the kin. After telling her that Nova had been my girlfriend, Storm of the North asked why she was here. And it got me thinking, wondering why she was… and then my cousin said she might want to still be with me.

I wonder if she wants to...

Crap. That makes a lot of sense. That makes… a ton of sense. I told her that’s not why Nova was here - just to visit - but I couldn’t shake the feeling my cousin was right. What if she was here to be with me again? That meant she wants to… oh god. Oh god, no. When Storm of the North saw I was getting upset, she tried to suggest that Nova wasn’t there for it. No way, I knew. I needed to get out of there, before she tried anything disgusting and wrong. I needed to go.

She’s not going to find me here. No way. I’m not doing anything. Not with her, or Reflection, or Earth Whisperer, or the Mage, or Anyone. No.

It started with Fire-Dancer coming by the caern. I was sorting through my thoughts still, in the caern, when she did. She wanted to talk about the cub.

( Emma asks about her cub, looking like she'd like to pick a fight. Then lectures on needing to open my heart. )

After a while of trying to make what I could of what she told me, I finished in the caern, and went looking for my cousin, to have that conversation with her about honour. I thought she’d gone to the Farmhouse (Edgewood. Whatever), but she wasn’t there, and it was raining, so I made some tea. And that’s when she arrived.

The Talon-Slayer.
( The wounds Riley inflicted are still fresh )

I didn’t need to sleep much. Setting up all of what I needed to do to prepare to destroy her luck was restful enough for me. I didn’t finish it, though - I needed to get together chiminage for the tuunraq that would help me. I was close.

( Emma takes issue with my anger towards Riley. How. Dare. She. )

Maybe I despise her.

I think I might have had some nightmares, but I don’t remember them. I did get the best night’s sleep in what’s probably years, and was ready and rearing to go before the sun was out. I didn’t feel pain from muscle spasms, either. It took a while, but I did a few more chores, and studied the mage mandala some more. There’s something… elusive, here. Its systems of references are interesting. After that, I went to the caern to feel the grandmother’s warmth for a while. Afterwards I sniffed around for my sister, but ended up following an old trail by mistake, and wound up at Edgewood. It seemed as good of time as any for some tea, so I took homid and went inside for a bit.

( Emma and Zoe; if she's fire dancer, her daughter is a little spark )

( I don't want to talk about Rebecca )

( Leave it to Furies to make some assumptions.  )

( KL is stabbed by a magic knife... and no one thinks to mention it to me? )

I spent a while in the caern in the afternoon, meditating on spiritual matters (and the mage lore), and generally feeling the ebb of the grandmother’s heart. I was tempted to open the caern again - I’m itching to feel the caern’s tug - but I can’t do that without permission. I bet they’re going to want ‘reasons’ too, like spiritual exploration isn’t a reason enough! And there’s no gatekeeper at the moment, since Mouse is gone… now there’s a thought. No, first I should spend more time ‘back,’ before I go claiming positions. Plus, wasn’t I just talking about how I’m a warrior, and I shouldn’t be getting arrogant like I’m a different auspice?

On the other hand, I was gatekeeper for 6 years, and I know most of the rites.

( Playing with Samantha, going hunting )

Maybe it's self-fulfilling. I think "i'm not going to get any sleep" and so I make myself anxious. And when I'm anxious, I can't sleep. It's a thought.

Thoughts are another thing keeping me up.

( Emma and Turtle in the Morning... )

I was getting pretty cold, and my Parka wasn't finished, and would attract attention if it was (I don't see many people wearing nice stuff in the scab). Plus, what I really need for this weather is my gutskin jacket to keep me dry. I bought some more layers off of Fire-Dancer to keep me warm, but when I head back out into the rain, I find that the material didn't keep me warm when it was wet. I found a place where I could hunker and watch the cops, next to the pizza place, but I still got pretty wet.

( A kind soul )

( Why am I agreeing with a cannibal? )

( I'm not even sure what I'm doing anymore, just that Maddie is innocent. )

It's not wet. I'm standing in the water. The river. Turtle is near by, with his dog. I'll say hi again.

We’re back to poor sleep.

Last night I distracted Neryarta for a while, playing and catching up with him for a few hours. He seems concerned about me, but salmon breath always was a bit of a worrier. It comes from his healing nature - when you’re a bear, all you smell is old wounds that need licked. It’s touching, even if it’s annoying when it’s aimed at me. He liked hearing about the battles, though. Brown Bears still have that touch of battle lust in them. I left out the worst details; he’d just start worrying me again.

I tried to sleep for a bit, but only got a little; I headed back to the tribal territory to study the rune-scape I drew for the mage. I think parts of it are starting to make sense… but there’s definitely a lot going on there. I need to stop being logical about it, and let my spirit drift a little as I go over it. Slug brought peyote. That might be a good use.

( Discussing scab matters with with a bird, a fox, and a Get )

( Teaching my cousin our way of making prayer )

( Almost caught by Slug; finding out more about the scab problems without having to go to the scab! )

I decided I got a lot done, even though I didn’t go to the scab, and went back to my territory to study and sleep.

 

( Sleep brings nightmares, Memory brings food, Emma brings a new start )