Unintentional generosity
Saturday, 12 April 2014 23:00![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
littlesilvertipA few days on all fours is what I needed. My skin was starting to get itchy, anyhow. My head is still a mess in lupus, too, but it’s getting better. The nightmares are still there. I spent the day laying around, resting, and hunted at dawn and dusk with my the other two. Nothing major to run down - everything stood their ground. I also did a little wandering, looking for territory. I’m tempted to run the Talons off theirs. They don’t know what they’re sitting on, really… I say ‘they,’ but I mean Humps-Everything. A territory for a tribe of one.
Early Saturday morning, while I was tending to my other spirit helpers, Neryarta came to me with a message. Apparently the ‘Jedi said my stolen dream was found and dealt with.’ Neryarta isn’t the best messenger - it smelled like he stopped to get fish on the way, and go peek through the gauntlet in a few places to check on his earthly children. I’ll have to remember to suggest that the ‘Jedi’ use slightly more… active spirits in the future.
I was too tired to head over right then, so I slept for a bit. When I woke up, I decided he might be a bit worried if I came to visit him on the full moon. I rolled up some wolf’s beard and marijuana and awakened it before I headed over. While I was getting the herbs, I realized I could probably get rid of my wyld tainted things that too dangerous to keep around and give the mage something for his efforts at the same time. I thought 'I have no use for something that might cause me to change even more, uncontrolably.' And I had no desires to continue my earlier experiments with it; I'm leaving wyld-working to the foolmoons in my tribe, and the insane Black Furies. I took half of the ‘bramblefruit’ (as the wyrmcomers called it) in my poke, smoked the awakened herbs for a bit, and then headed on down to meet Tail-Eater.
This was a huge mistake.
I might as well have been drunk. I know I missed most of the important things that were said. I was slow witted and dull. Hell, everything was a bit of a jumble then, never mind now. I got really confused when I asked him about who did it, what he did to find them out, and so on. His answers didn’t make any sense. And then he started talking about me beating the answer out of him, and I seemed pretty surprised by his leaping to violence so fast. It took me a while to figure out that he wasn’t going to tell me who did it. At the time, I was annoyed, but with a clearer head? I don’t /care/ that they’re clean of taint. That’s the biggest danger, but not the only danger. Who knows what else they saw in my mind?
After a while, I finally accepted that Tail-Eater wasn’t going to tell me anything, but I figured he still had done me a service, and I should pay him anyhow for his trouble. I gave him the ‘bramblefruit’, and he… acted like I was giving something away great. That much sticks in my mind clearly. He was overly-impressed. Kept telling me how worthwhile it was, and how he didn’t deserve it. I didn’t think much of it at the time. Damnit, I should have. He wanted to show me a talisman for… him getting into the spirit lands? I can’t be remembering that right. But then he realized how high I was, and decided that was a bad decision.
Somehow the fact that he’s going out of town to visit mage friends came up. I asked him to buy something for me (things, information, anything), and promised to pay him back in kind. They say some get ‘the munchies’ when they smoke - I apparently tried to go spur-of-the-moment trading. If he does get anything, I sure hope I can pay him back.
It took me a while to come down, and I spent the time meditating in the caern to replenish some of my spiritual strength. And that’s about when I realized I’d been an utter mooncalf. I should have just gone sober, and promised him to leave if my rage began to come up enough to put him in danger (which it rarely does naturally, anymore). I hurried back to record what I could remember on paper before it slipped from my mind, but I’m positive I’ve forgotten a lot. I was in the process of putting down my first impressions of the talisman (I’m pretty sure it doesn’t look like I remember it), when I suddenly realized the gravity of what he said about the fruit. I spent a while investigating what I had left, this time going to my notes on the time Tail-Eater showed me the lightsaber. Now I knew what I was looking for and at, the parallels were obvious. Here, all this time, I’ve been coveting tass… and I’ve been sitting on a small pile of it. I just gave away a massive amount of tass.
I’ve just been a very special kind of mooncalf. If he asks, I’m going to say I was feeling very generous, and like him that much.
Early Saturday morning, while I was tending to my other spirit helpers, Neryarta came to me with a message. Apparently the ‘Jedi said my stolen dream was found and dealt with.’ Neryarta isn’t the best messenger - it smelled like he stopped to get fish on the way, and go peek through the gauntlet in a few places to check on his earthly children. I’ll have to remember to suggest that the ‘Jedi’ use slightly more… active spirits in the future.
I was too tired to head over right then, so I slept for a bit. When I woke up, I decided he might be a bit worried if I came to visit him on the full moon. I rolled up some wolf’s beard and marijuana and awakened it before I headed over. While I was getting the herbs, I realized I could probably get rid of my wyld tainted things that too dangerous to keep around and give the mage something for his efforts at the same time. I thought 'I have no use for something that might cause me to change even more, uncontrolably.' And I had no desires to continue my earlier experiments with it; I'm leaving wyld-working to the foolmoons in my tribe, and the insane Black Furies. I took half of the ‘bramblefruit’ (as the wyrmcomers called it) in my poke, smoked the awakened herbs for a bit, and then headed on down to meet Tail-Eater.
This was a huge mistake.
I might as well have been drunk. I know I missed most of the important things that were said. I was slow witted and dull. Hell, everything was a bit of a jumble then, never mind now. I got really confused when I asked him about who did it, what he did to find them out, and so on. His answers didn’t make any sense. And then he started talking about me beating the answer out of him, and I seemed pretty surprised by his leaping to violence so fast. It took me a while to figure out that he wasn’t going to tell me who did it. At the time, I was annoyed, but with a clearer head? I don’t /care/ that they’re clean of taint. That’s the biggest danger, but not the only danger. Who knows what else they saw in my mind?
After a while, I finally accepted that Tail-Eater wasn’t going to tell me anything, but I figured he still had done me a service, and I should pay him anyhow for his trouble. I gave him the ‘bramblefruit’, and he… acted like I was giving something away great. That much sticks in my mind clearly. He was overly-impressed. Kept telling me how worthwhile it was, and how he didn’t deserve it. I didn’t think much of it at the time. Damnit, I should have. He wanted to show me a talisman for… him getting into the spirit lands? I can’t be remembering that right. But then he realized how high I was, and decided that was a bad decision.
Somehow the fact that he’s going out of town to visit mage friends came up. I asked him to buy something for me (things, information, anything), and promised to pay him back in kind. They say some get ‘the munchies’ when they smoke - I apparently tried to go spur-of-the-moment trading. If he does get anything, I sure hope I can pay him back.
It took me a while to come down, and I spent the time meditating in the caern to replenish some of my spiritual strength. And that’s about when I realized I’d been an utter mooncalf. I should have just gone sober, and promised him to leave if my rage began to come up enough to put him in danger (which it rarely does naturally, anymore). I hurried back to record what I could remember on paper before it slipped from my mind, but I’m positive I’ve forgotten a lot. I was in the process of putting down my first impressions of the talisman (I’m pretty sure it doesn’t look like I remember it), when I suddenly realized the gravity of what he said about the fruit. I spent a while investigating what I had left, this time going to my notes on the time Tail-Eater showed me the lightsaber. Now I knew what I was looking for and at, the parallels were obvious. Here, all this time, I’ve been coveting tass… and I’ve been sitting on a small pile of it. I just gave away a massive amount of tass.
I’ve just been a very special kind of mooncalf. If he asks, I’m going to say I was feeling very generous, and like him that much.
